One Eurobond to Rule Them All

If you haven't seen this already, check out this hilarious post which interjects the Eurobond into famous lines from Lord of the Rings.  Here are some that I really like:

"One Bond to rule them all; One Bond to find them; One Bond to bring them all; and in the darkness bind them."

European Council: "If you ask it of me, I will give you the right to issue the One Bond."
Merkel: "You offer it to me freely? I do not deny that my heart has greatly desired this. In the place of a Council you would have a Queen! Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the Morn! Treacherous as the Seas! Stronger than the foundations of the Earth! All shall love me and despair! … I have passed the test. I will diminish, and go into the West, and remain Merkel."

"The Euro cannot be destroyed by any craft that we here possess. It was made in the fires of Frankfurt. Only there can it be unmade. It must be taken deep into the heart of the European Central Bank, and cast back into the fiery chasm from whence it came!"

"Arise, Voters of Syriza! Spears shall be shaken, shields shall be splintered! A sword day… a red day… ere the sun rises! DEATH!! DEATH!!!"

"One does not simply walk out of the Eurozone. Its iron gates are guarded by more than central bankers. There are technocrats there who do not sleep. And the great € is ever watchful. Not with ten thousand drachma could you do this. It is folly."

"The Greeks delved too greedily and too deep. You know what they awoke in the darkness of the Bundesbank."

"I think you should leave the Euro behind, Greece. Is that so hard?"
"Well, no. … And yes. Now it comes to it, I don't feel like parting with it. It's mine, I found it. It came to me!"
"There's no need to get angry."
"Well, if I'm angry, it's your fault! It's mine… my own… my precious…"
"Precious? It's been called that before, but not by you."
"What business is it of yours what I do with my own currency?"
"I think you've had the Euro quite long enough."

"We wants the drachma back. We needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little Eurocrats. Wicked, tricksy, false!"